Thursday, June 9, 2011

Talk about a Pet Peeve

by Guest Blogger Janet Bolin

Oriole_pecking_and_CHIRPing 7  AM: CHIRP. Awww, how cute! A male Baltimore Oriole is perched on the outside door handle, tilting his head and peeking into the kitchen. His black beady eye seems to stare at me like he’s begging for more oranges. Bang! Oh, no, birdie, don’t peck the glass. You might hurt yourself. More oranges on the way. Maybe he’s used to humans and wants to be a sort of outdoor wild pet?

9 AM: How cute! He’s still pecking at the glass and chirping loudly. He has more oranges, what else can he want?

10 AM: He’s still at it. Apparently, he thinks his reflection is another male Baltimore Oriole and he wants it to go away.

11 AM: Peck, peck, peck. CHIRP! Now he’s tap dancing on the ledge at the bottom of the door, beating his wings on the glass and pecking at his reflection. Very cute, but he’s going to hurt himself. Phew! He flew back to the oranges.

Oriole_tapdancing 11:01AM: Peck! CHIRP! He’s back. Okay, a respite. He’s flown off for more oranges.

11:02:  Peck, peck! CHIRP! Seriously, if he keeps this up, he’s going to do himself a serious injury. What if I hang a beach towel on the outside of the glass door so he can’t see his reflection? Oh. He attacks windows.

6 PM: Peck, peck, peck. He’s been pecking at the door and windows for eleven hours now, except for frequent, very short, trips for another beak full of oranges. He must need a lot of oranges to stay this active. You’d think he’d get tired. I am.

9 PM: Finally, the Baltimore Oriole has gone to bed for the night.

6 AM: Peck, peck, peck! What is that racket awakening me from a deep sleep? CHIRP! Oh. It’s that Baltimore Oriole.

Noon: Yes, you’re cute, peeking in like that, but really, all day yesterday, and all morning today. Shouldn’t you be building a nest or something?

6 PM: What’s in those oranges? That bird must be exhausted. I am.

9 PM: Phew. He’s gone to bed. Not that he has bothered to build a nest, yet. He’s been too busy attacking the door and the windows . . .

6 AM: Peck, peck! CHIRP! Peck, peck, peck, peck, peck! I DON’T get up at 6. Certainly not every morning! I think I have a pet—a pet peeve. Okay, hang on, birdie, I’ll get you some more oranges.
Janet Bolin’s short stories have been published in trade magazines and literary journals. Her humorous essays have been read aloud on national radio programs on the CBC (Canadian Broadcasting Corporation) and published in the anthology DEAR SAD GOAT. Janet’s first novel, DIRE THREADS, the first in the Threadville Mystery series, is in stores now.

“With a winning cast of characters, Bolin should be able to stitch together quite a series for Willow and her fellow shopkeepers. Certain to appeal to Lorna Barrett's 'Booktown Mystery' readers.”
– Library Journal