My new favorite number!

Well, there was certainly a lot to celebrate yesterday.

First I got an email from my editor saying that according to Bookscan, Sentenced to Death was the #1 bestselling mystery mass market paperback for the week (that would be last week).  Weeee!

I must admit, it was hard to focus on my work (I'm writing the third Victoria Square mystery) after that.  But I made my minimum word count, which was worth celebrating in itself.

Of course, what I was REALLY waiting for was the phone to ring.  And it did.  And it WAS my editor.  And (drum roll) Sentenced To Death was #17 on the New York Times bestsellers list for mass market paperbacks.

Woo-hoo!

That's two steps up from Chapter & Hearse.

Ahhh, seventeen.  My new favorite number.

Of course, while I'm celebrating for Tricia, I'm also hoping that with this book getting so much attention, my other characters/books (under other names) just might get some attention, too.  We're talking Katie in A Crafty Killing (Victoria Square #1) and all the Jeff Resnick books and short stories.  (Hey, they're like my kids.  I love them and want them all to do well.)

As it happens, the next Booktown Mystery (Murder on The Half Shelf) is already written.  (As is the 2nd Victoria Square Mystery.)  When I finish this current book (in September), I'll jump right back into Tricia's world.  And boy have I got a lot planned for the denizens of the little village of Stoneham, New Hampshire.  (Mwa-ha-ha!)

In the meantime . . . if you've never read the Booktown Mysteries, I hope you'll give them a try.  They start with Murder is Binding.

Okay, back to work!

Where's Alexander Graham Bell When I Need Him?

One Christmas -- at least (mumble, mumble) years ago, my brother (the one who always buys me small kitchen appliances) bought me a wall phone.  It's a great phone ... but it's fallen off the wall a few times, and there's a big chunk of plastic missing from the receiver, and the 47th replacement cord has a short in it.  (It's long.  I like to walk around the kitchen when I talk.)  It's time for a replacement.

I will probably be the last woman on the planet with a landline.  Why?  Because I loath cell phones and handheld wireless phones.  You can't rest them on your shoulder when you're in for a marathon call.  Your arm gets tired after a while and all the blood drains from your fingers.

I like that when the power goes off, the landline is still there.  I have a cell phone and it takes about five minutes from the time I turn it on until it finds a signal.  In an emergency, it's the pits.

The problem now is finding a phone that I can put on my shoulder.  Ain't no such animal.  Wireless only.  Sure they're great if you want to walk around the house, but not much else.  (The shelf life for those phones seems to be about three years.  We keep having to replace them because the batteries go dead and it's more expensive to replace them than buy a new phone.)

In the Booktown Mystery series, Tricia has an old black Art Deco phone on her cash desk.  We had one of those when I was a kid.  It was an "illegal" extension phone.  The bell was disconnected so the phone company wouldn't know.  Now -- who cares how many phones are scattered around the house.  (We have five.)

I want that old fashioned phone.  (I've seen a few at "antique" stores, but they want too much.)  And I want one I can rest on my shoulder like the one pictured above.
I've searched the internet to no avail.

Am I the only one left who wants a REAL phone?
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Changing that old sofa . . .

Our cottage has an old couch.  It's actually in pretty good shape because, let's face it--nobody's sitting on it for seven months of the year.  However, it does have one tiny flaw.  The sun bleached one of the arms and the material split.

Since I didn't pick out the couch, I'm not a real fan of the upholstery.  I've wanted to do something about it for years.  Since the living room is only 10 x 13 we decided we'd go off in search of a loveseat.  Then we might actually get some breathing room.

Since there aren't a lot of furniture stores out in the stix, we visited the only one within a 30-mile range (with free delivery).  This is a HUGE place with gigantic room after room of furniture.  And every single chair and couch had saddle bag arms.  No kidding.  Hundreds of them.  In all kinds of fabrics and colors of leather.  But there wasn't one thing that didn't look like the next.

Ick!

And the prices!  There wasn't a loveseat under $1000.  Suddenly our old couch (which is EXTREMELY comfortable I might add) starting looking pretty good--icky pineapple upholstery and all.


Okay, I take that last part back.  It's still icky upholstery.  And that's where Sure-FIt slipcovers come in.
The installation wasn't nearly as easy as the online video said, and we struggled for about 15 minutes, but finally we got the thing looking pretty good.



What do you think?  (Needs more pillows, huh?)
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Great product. Now if I could just use it . . .

Okay, so Mr. L gave me a Kindle for my birthday last year.  And I love reading on it.  It's great.

And aside from opening a book, I really have no clue how to use it.

It came with a very small "instruction manuel" which basically tells you how to turn it on and BUY BOOKS.  Other than that, you're supposed to use the USER GUIDE on the Kindle itself.

Well, that would be swell...if I could GET TO IT.  I have three pages of books and book samples on my Menu (if that's the correct term), only I don't know how to page back through the list of books and samples to GET to my User Guide.

My friend Dru-Ann Love was going to give me a step-by-step lesson in how to use the thing while we were at the Malice Domestic conference in Arlington back in April, but we were both busy visiting and making new friends, and when we were together, we forgot all about it.

My sister-in-law is coming to visit next week.  She's got a Kindle.  I'm gonna sit that girl down and have a little chat on Kindle 101.  Then maybe I'll gift her with one of my books.  (I think that's the only way I might actually get her to read one of them.  She's not a mystery fan, moresthepity.)

Until then, Mr. Kindle is going to gather dust.

Too big for his bed

In prep for the new book's launch (yesterday--with a book signing tonight), I've done a bunch of guest blogs and interviews.

But today it isn't me being highlighted, it's my tiny son Fred.  He's the guest today on the Conscious Cat Blog.

In case you want to read about him, you can find him at the Conscious Cat.

Here's the picture that didn't make it into the piece.  (Fred spilling out of his bed.  Gotta love it!)

Rush out and buy these books -- RIGHT NOW!

I love the first Tuesday of the month, because that's when my publisher releases a bunch of new books.  (And, oh, look who's leading the pack!) I hope you'll rush to the store (or to your favorite online bookseller) and buy these wonderful books.

SENTENCED TO DEATH
By Lorna Barrett (Hey, that's me!)
It’s Founder’s Day in Stoneham and the whole village has turned out to celebrate in the square, including Tricia’s friend and festivities organizer Deborah Black. As everyone watches Deborah give the opening speech, a small aircraft crashes into the village gazebo, killing both Deborah and the pilot. While the Sheriff’s Department is convinced that it was an accident, Tricia has a feeling that there’s more to the story. And when she reads between the lines of the case, what she finds is worse than the most sinister whodunit…

Available From:
Amazon ~ Barnes & Noble ~ Kindle ~ Nook

Independent Booksellers



 
DIRE THREADS
By Janet Bolin
Willow Vanderling's quaint new embroidery shop is not a hit with the local zoning commissioner. When he's murdered, the evidence is stacked against Willow.

Available From:

Amazon ~ Barnes & Noble

Kindle ~ Nook

Independent Booksellers




UNRAVELED
by Maggie Sefton
Spring is in the air of Fort Connor, Colorado-a time of new beginnings for the House of Lambspun knitters. But for fellow knitter Jennifer's new real estate client, it is his end. He's been murdered and Kelly Flynn is left unraveling a tangle of clues. This may prove to be her most challenging project yet.

Available From:

Amazon ~ Barnes & Noble

Kindle ~ Nook

Independent Booksellers


A PARFAIT MURDER
by Wendy Lyn Watson
When Tally's cousin Bree spots her deadbeat ex-husband strolling the Lantana County Fair with a fat wallet and a vixen on his arm, she immediately files for back child support. But when his lawyer is found dead, things get a little sticky. Did Bree serve up a dish of cold, sweet revenge? Or is she another hapless victim of a parfait crime?
Available From:

Amazon ~ Barnes & Noble

Kindle ~ Nook

Independent Booksellers


FINGER LICKIN' DEAD
By Riley Adams
When an anonymous food critic blasts several local restaurants- including Aunt Pat's-Lulu Taylor and her customers are biting mad, especially when they learn that Eppie Currian is the pen name of their friend Evelyn's cheating boyfriend. When "Eppie" gets his own fatal review, the list of suspects is longer than the list of specials at the best BBQ place in Memphis.

Available from:

Amazon ~ Barnes & Noble

Kindle ~ Nook

Independent Booksellers

Tear-Out Time

For years I have saved nearly all the decorating magazines I've received.  I'm literally drowning in them.  It's time to lighten the load.

I thought it would be hard to part with them, but as it turns out--it's not.  I'm going through the stacks and tearing out the pages that interest me, and tossing the rest.

Of course there are still some magazines that I simply won't toss out.  One of them is Victoria Magazine.  I have most of the issues from it's first incarnation and all of them from its second (and duplicates on most of those, too, which I keep at the family cottage). 


Also, I won't get rid of Teatime magazine.  The photography is just gorgeous, and they highlight lots of different china patterns with their recipes.  Nope, no negotiation on these two.

But now I have to start sorting all those pages I'm tearing out.

What magazines do you subscribe to that you won't toss out?

What am I doing in the kitchen when I'm not ready to cook?

by Guest Blogger Tonya Thomas

I don't know about you, but I'm either losing my mind or I just don't pay attention to the things going on in my life.

More than once a day I'll head into my kitchen from some other part of my house and stand there and look around wondering what the heck I'm doing there.

Okay, I'll admit it. I have a lot on my mind.  In this day and age--wouldn't you?  Worrying about gasoline prices, encroaching inflation and where the heck am I going to get my next idea for my current story ... why wouldn't I be preoccupied by something or other.

In general, writers are just plain weird. I mean, think of it. We live in fantasy worlds and get paid for it. (Nice, when it actually happens, I might add. And it doesn't happen nearly often enough.)
I primarily write short stories about women in complicated relationships. I have better things to think about than does the washer need fabric softener or should I use fat-free or lite salad dressing on my salad?

But these lapses of memory do concern me.  Am I really losing it or am I really just wrapped up in other things?  I don't know -- and until I try to drive to the grocery store and end up three counties over ... maybe I'll pretend to be like Scarlett O'Hara and worry about it . . . tomorrow.

So tell me, do you experience these same lapses and what do you think (or do) about them?

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Tonya Thomas is an award-winning author who currently writes women's fiction.  You can find her stories available for Kindle, Nook, Smashwords and other e readers.  Her box set, THE EDGE AND I, contains five stories for the price of three.  You can find her at her website/blog, on Facebook, and Twitter (@TonyaThomas1), or visit her Amazon store.

Sprucing anyone?

Monday I went on a shopping spree.  Now, if you knew me at all you'd know that shopping and me just doesn't happen much.  But I was determined.  I had a list and I stuck to it.

My goal:  stuff for the family cottage.

We have two little windows on the east side of the living room (we're talking 28 x 24 inches) and ever since we've owned the place, they have never had any kind of window treatment.  The fact that they're surrounded by a brick wall (first there was a fireplace, now a wood stove) might have something to do with that.  So I was determined to get some kind of sheers to cover them.  Why?  Our neighbor's upstairs windows look right into them.  Sometimes you don't want to be the show they're watching.

Could I find ANY kind of sheers I liked?  But I did get a couple of spring rods.  (More on the sheers later.)

I bought a new garbage pail (with a foot control!), a new shower curtain, a kitchen timer (because who knows how to use the built-in one on the microwave?  Not me--and I read the directions, too).  I broke the traverse rod on my "office" window, so I hit JCPenny to get a new one.

I'm also in the market for a new area rug for the living room (ideally I'd like something in a blue oriental--but haven't found anything like that locally and within my budget), and slipcovers for the couch (and some new throw pillows).

About those sheers . . . I couldn't find ANYTHING I liked.  Time to hit the Internet.  After looking at countless sites I asked myself, what is it I really wanted?  Victorian lace curtains.  Bingo!  I also discovered they come in what are called "tiers."  Found the perfect ones, very pretty and the exact size of the windows.  Win-win!

The next few times I'm down there, I'm going to be busy, busy, busy.  (Did I mention I need to do some painting, too?)

Okay, I admit it.  I've been watching Sarah's Summer House on HGTV and I was inspired.  Of course, I don't have Sarah's budget, and we're not doing a renovation, just a little redecoration.  But by the end of the summer (if not well before), I'm hoping the place looks spruced up.

Is there any sprucing up in your future?
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Waste not--want not!

Ever since our county initiated its recycling program they have taken glass bottles, newspapers, cans, and plastic that's labeled 1 and 2.

That all changes on Wednesday.  As of June 1st, they will now allow you to toss out ANY plastic.

Yea!

As it happens, because of the Memorial Day holiday, our garbage, which usually goes out on Tuesdays, will be picked up on Wednesday:  June 1st.

Ever since I heard of the new ruling, I've been saving all my other plastic.  Why let it go into the landfill when in two weeks it would be recycled.

Does your county recycle all plastics?
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Don't look for Booktown Mysteries in the Buffalo Libraries

When my Jeff Resnick series was published, I was really proud that so many libraries in the Buffalo, NY area carried the books.  Of course the books are SET in Buffalo, NY -- so that helped.

So I was puzzled when not one library in Buffalo carried my Booktown Mysteries.  Oh, I know that a lot of library systems don't catalog paperback books, and the series is in paperback.  But I looked up other cozy mystery authors on the website for the Buffalo Erie County Library System, and their books are there.

Did I offend the acquisition librarians in Buffalo?  I mean, I've sent them a postcard for every book in the series (and for A Crafty Killing, too.  It's not there, either).  And they haven't purchased the other two books in my Jeff Resnick series, either.  : (

I know I have at least three readers in the greater Buffalo area  because they've signed up for my newsletter.  I can thank Barnes & Noble for the only readers I have in the Buffalo area.  (THANK YOU, BARNES & NOBLE!!!)

But for some reason I can't seem to make a crack with the acquisition librarians.

I know there are other libraries in big cities that don't have the books, either--but for some reason I feel hurt that the Buffalo libraries have snubbed Tricia and Angelica.  (And Katie, too.)  They embraced Jeff (in hardcover--but not trade paperback).  I just don't get it.

So, the question is, should I throw away money by sending all the libraries a postcard for Sentenced to Death?

What do you think?
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How NOT to plant potatoes . . .

Yesterday I worked in the garden for a little while.  I planted my potatoes.

For the past few years, I've been planting my seed potatoes in a big blue tub.  Not this year.  The yield was too small, so back in the ground they go.  I have limited garden space, so they're going in behind the black-eyed susans.

Unfortunately for me, the phone rang in the middle of planting.  Since we have a wireless landline (yes, we're still dinosaurs and haven't gone totally cell yet ... maybe not for a long time), Mr. L brought the phone out to me and I had a rather long conversation with my brother.

I continued to plant my potatoes, which was rather awkward to say the least.  Everything was okay until bedtime when I realized "Ouch, my back hurts."  Only in one spot and I think it's because I was holding the phone in an awkward position for about ten minutes.

All I can say is, those potatoes better grow.  (Or maybe next time I should just call my brother back.)

Have you planted anything in your garden this year?  (The annuals go in next week.)
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Not such an ordinary week . . .

We're all in a tizzy because we've got a house guest arriving later today. My sister-in-law is coming for four days. I wish it was for a happy visit, but she and Mr. L will be looking at assisted living centers for their mother.

When company comes you have an opportunity to do things that aren't in the usual routine.  We rarely go out to dinner, but SIL wants to go out for a real Western NY fish fry. She'll probably stock up on Western NY goodies (and ship them home--she's traveling light with just carry on luggage).  Things like Zweigel's hot dog sauce, Webber's mustard, etc.

Meanwhile, I still have a few things to do before she arrives tonight.  Like finish cleaning the guest room.  It really only needs to be dusted and the bed made, but that's something that's not on my usual Tuesday list of things to do.  (Thank goodness the cleaning ladies came yesterday.)

So while I'm sad about the reason for the visit, I'm glad to have a chance to connect with my SIL.  She lives so far away that I've only seen her 6-7 times in twenty years, and our phone conversations have been brief.

Have you got a house guest coming to visit in the near future?
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Should L.L. be offended?

Like clockwork, every Monday I get a report on my website hits.  I'm not sure websites do as much as they used to in terms of readers visiting them, but we all have them just in case new readers want to know more about us, our books, and our characters.

If you're a practicing schizophrenic--that is, as an author I have three names--you get three reports.

My Lorna website report always comes in first.  Every week that site gets the most hits.  And it's consistent.  The same amount, give or take 10-20 hits either up or down.

My Lorraine website report shows interest in that name and work has been steadily growing since A Crafty Killing came out in February.  True, most Booktown Mystery readers haven't made the connection that Lorraine and Lorna are the same--even though I've been screaming that fact at the top of my lungs for almost three years . . . but I'm very hopeful.

Then comes my L.L. Bartlett report.  There's one word for that:  pitiful.  It's less than half of what Lorraine gets, and only a quarter of what Lorna gets--despite the fact that I've been writing under that name for three years longer than I have the Lorna name.
I don't know what to do about the fact that people don't know that Lorna/Lorraine/L.L. are the same person.

Skywriting?

I don't know what to do about pumping up those numbers, or finding more readers for Lorraine and L.L.

I wish I did.
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When you hate your word processing program . . .

I've been scarce this week.  Why?

Word.  Microsoft Word.  It ate my mailing list.  Luckily a few days before I had printed out labels for my postcards, but while I was updated the list, Word hiccuped as I was saving it and it was gone.  GONE.  And the last time I had backed up was in January.

Well, there was more than just the gnashing of teeth, let me tell you.  I've been working for TWO days to try to reconstruct it from various other lists, and I still have another 3-5 hours to go, and am missing over 300 addresses.

I also color code my list, so I know where the addresses came from.  Now I'm wondering if the that was too much.

A long list + color coding = disaster?

So I'm going to break the list in half by zip code and back it up every night from now on.

I had hoped to get some serious writing done this weekend.  Now . . . hello list building.

What important file have you lost on your computer?

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It's Not Just A Big Day . . .

By guest blogger Kelly McClymer

Thanks for inviting me to share a pet peeve for Pet Peeve Thursday, Lorna! I have so many (for example, you cannot crumble a piece of paper without a lot of effort, but you can crumple it easily enough: why do writers not know this?!?).

But my big pet peeve right now revolves around weddings. I love to attend weddings, but not because of the big fancy cake or band or dancing (well, okay, I do like the dancing, even though I dance like Elaine on Seinfeld). No, I love the way family and friends circle the couple and support the big step into marriage. It may take a village to raise a child, but it takes family and friends to remind a couple that the wedding day is the beginning of a (hopefully) long and rewarding journey.

My pet peeve is that all the hype around having a perfect wedding day misses the point: this is the beginning. One day of many, many days, if you're lucky. You need some ... ummm ... interesting ... things to happen so that everyone in attendance can laugh about it as they share the memory around holiday dinners and anniversaries.

But no. Everyone wants the perfect dress, the perfect cake, the flawless ceremony. I know this for two reasons: 1) my daughter recently got engaged and has begun trying on wedding gowns and thinking about when/where/how; and 2) I'm releasing my out-of-print historical romance Once Upon a Wedding Series in ebook format and I've been looking at wedding photos non-stop in order to find images for the covers. The artist and I finally decided (after lots of dresses, veils, flowers, etc.) to focus on cakes. There are some awesome (and no doubt expensive) wedding cakes out there, let me tell you. Including chocolate cakes. Chocolate. Cake.

By the time I was finished looking at all these images, even I was beginning to think about how to make my daughter's wedding perfect. Fortunately, I came to my senses by laughing with my husband about how our low-key ceremony, where a friend took photos with our not great camera, and my dad played bartender, was perfectly almost perfect. So I think as we head into June, the wedding month, it is a good time to use my guest Pet Peeve post to remind people that the wedding day is one day and perfect is the enemy of good stories to tell around the holiday table.

Can't you just see Wills and Kate laughing with their grandchildren over how Wills had to give that ring a good push to get it on Kate's finger? I can.
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Kelly McClymer started her career writing short science fiction, but then switched to historical romance for the happily ever after. Currently, she writes young adult novels (The Salem Witch Tryouts series, Must Love Black). Her backlist Once Upon a Wedding series is fatefully being released in ebook form just in time for a promotional effort to help ensure her daughter's wedding has plenty of family and friends to gather around the couple...and make sure there are some memorable flubs to talk about over turkey. And maybe a chocolate wedding cake. You can read the latest news at http://kellymcclymer.com/wordpress

And CRACK--they were gone!

So far this May we've had one lovely (warm) day.

That was Friday.

Saturday wasn't horrible, but it wasn't warm and sunny either.

Yesterday--fuggetaboutit.  It was COLD.  I realized the screen on the back door had been left up and went to put it down and CRACK!  Gone were the tips of three of my fingernails.

Now, I've probably lifted and lowered that screen a hundred times, so why would it decide to eat three of my fingernails right there and then?

It seems like every time my nails get long enough for nail polish something like this happens.  (And I have a signing on Sunday.  They won't grow much before then.)

So, what annoying thing happened to you over the weekend?

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Just another way to go crazy

Several months ago, Amazon started sharing Bookscan numbers with authors.

According to Wikipedia:  Nielsen BookScan is a data provider for the book publishing industry, owned by the Nielsen Company. BookScan compiles point of sale data for book sales.

Bookscan doesn't track ALL books sold, but it can give you an idea of what and where you're selling.

Of course, like the Amazon rankings, it can drive you crazy as you watch your numbers go down every week.  (On Amazon that's good.  On Bookscan that's bad.)

The Jeff Resnick books have been available for well over a month now, and they've suddenly shown up on Bookscan.  I hadn't been expecting this.  So far 9 copies have sold.  That means that BOOKSELLERS are selling copies of the books!!!  I'm astounded and extremely happy.  (I just wish the numbers were a heck of a lot better.)  Most of my sales have been from Amazon, which don't show up on Bookscan.  And since I lowered the price to $11.95 (just a week ago), they've been selling quite a bit better.

(So if you've been holding off--quick!  Go buy copies of the books.  Do it now.  We'll wait.)

Sentenced to Death comes out in four weeks.  It'll be interesting to see if the sales of the rest of the Booktown Mysteries pick up.  (And why doesn't Bookmarked for Death sell as well as the other books in the series???)

Okay, I admit it, I'm a numbers freak.  I love my spreadsheets and I work on them every day.  It's fun.  It's frustrating.  It's anal.  But I do it anyway.

What do you do that's fun, frustrating and anal?

To Tweet or not to Tweet--that is the question

If everybody I know tweets, how come they haven't found me and I haven't found them on Twitter?

Okay, I admit it.  I just don't get Twitter.  I mean, I've been on it for like two years, and I don't get it.  I've even taken an online class about it and still haven't picked up the intricacies.

I use Tweetdeck, which seems a lot more coherent than just a plain Twitter account, and this way I can coordinate my various personas.  Nice.  But what am I supposed to tweet?

And it seems like almost all my followers are other authors.  We're all telling each other about our books and not selling any of them.

I find people who tweet constantly to be a real PITA and I unfollow them as soon as possible.  I mean, do I need to know every time they burp or take a sip of Diet Coke?

I'm not saying I'm going to pitch Tweetdeck any time soon, but I don't even log on every day.

If you use Twitter, what do you think the greatest benefit is?

BTW, if you WANT to follow me, I'm @LornaBarrett @LorraineBartlet @LLBartlettbooks

There's no place like home!

I'm home at last after being away for six days and five nights . . . and all I can say is "There's no place like home."

Am I sorry I went away?  Heck no!  I loved seeing my friends, meeting readers, and talking with my agent and editor.  But it's too bad you can't just beam in for the festivities and beam back home to your own bed at night.

I love to go out to lunch, but I like eating breakfast and dinner at home.  Going out to eat for all three meals of the day gets tiresome.  And the portions at restaurants are way too big.  As a kid who grew up cleaning her plate, it's hard to leave something behind, but I'm learning.

"Being on" is very tiring.  I was working on the outline for a new story (that may never see the light of day), so I could retreat to my head on various occasions when things got to be too much.  And since I NEVER work from an outline, this was a new experience.  At least if I never finish the story, I know how it ends!

Weather can be your friend when it's nice, and your enemy when it stinks.  I had stinky weather on the trip home.  Continuous rain and some pretty nasty fog.  So much fog, that I pulled off I-90 and drove the back roads until I was far enough away from Lake Erie that the fog had dissipated.

There is no place like home.  After being on the road, I pulled up the driveway and saw my cat Fred's little face peering through the front door to make sure it really was me.  *Sniff*

Okay, so I now have no plans to travel again until next April for the next Malice Domestic conference.  That makes me sad . . . I like the journey and I like the destination . . . I just hate the travel home.

What's your favorite part of a trip?

(P.S. As soon as I download my pictures, I'll post them on my Facebook page.)

Coffee Klatch!

About once a month my friend Pat and I get together for coffee.  Of course, I don't drink coffee--but she does.  (I usually have hot chocolate.)

Pat and I are both authors and we talk business.  So far every time we've gotten together we've managed to fill three hours with just business talk.

What kind of business talk?  Selling books.  Selling print books.  Selling e books.  Graphic design.  Business cards. Writing.  Not writing.  Wanting to write different things.  Promotion.  Yada, yada, yada.

Now I'm sure many people would be bored silly listening to us go on, and especially for three hours, but when you're starved for conversation about your job, and how you accomplish all elements of it, it's fun and exciting.

Today is coffee talk day.  I can't wait!

Do you have a friend you meet with for coffee (or hot chocolate)?

Open wide!

Every six months I go to get my teeth cleaned. I learned the hard way that if you don't, problems develop.  Big EXPENSIVE problems.  (After I lost my dental insurance, I didn't go for two years?  Big mistake.  I estimate I've paid $15,000 since.)

I hate getting my teeth cleaned.  For one thing, no matter how much I brush them, I'll be told I didn't do it right.  I'll be scolded because there tartar on some back tooth which is nearly impossible to reach with a toothbrush, or a the crooked tooth on the side where tartar builds up in the spot that the brush can't reach.

I have been praised for my excellent flossing, but I must confess that it's not me it's my dental flossers that have turned the tide on plaque.  Regular floss (even the unshreddible kind) splits and shreds and it got stuck in my teeth and was more trouble than it was worth.  And then I was introduced to flossers.  I keep them on my work desk and when I think about it (about 4-5 times a day), I floss.  Win-win situation!  (My dentist admits she keeps them in her car and flosses at red lights.  It drives her kids nuts.)

What fun thing are you doing today?

Anybody need some ham?

The days of big family dinners are gone due to the fact that I don't have much family left.

And so Easter came around.  There were just three of us and we wanted a nice Easter ham.  Of course we waited too late to go in search of a ham and the smallest one we could find was 8.24 lbs.

EIGHT POUNDS OF HAM???  What were we thinking?

But we bought it and cooked it.  "We'll each eat two pounds of it for supper, and then you'll only have two pounds of leftovers," my mother said.

Um...sure.

Actually, after dinner Mr. L cut off most of the spiral ham and put it in a gallon freezer bag and popped it into the fridge.  I put the HUGE bone (which still had a lot of meat on it) in two freezer bags and popped it in the freezer.  (Boy am I glad we have that little chest freezer in the garage.)

So, I figured we could eat ham sandwiches, and I could make myself a few western omelets.  I'm not a fan of split pea soup, but would love to hear other recipes that where a ham bone can be used.

Got any to share?

Reserve one room at the mental institution, please

E Books are the way for mid-list authors to become millionaires.  That's what I keep hearing.

So what am I doing wrong?

Wednesday Lee Goldberg (who I have mega admiration for) said:  "any midlist author who signs another pissant three-book contract with a NY publisher (or any publisher) should check themselves into a mental institution right away."

Well, I just did sign such a contract--and for a nice chunk of change, too.  Not nearly as much as Barry Eisler just turned down.  (Did you hear, he turned down $500,000.  YES, all those zeroes are correct.)  The books I'm contracted for won't be available until 2013, 2014, and 2015.  By then maybe I will have looked like a fool for signing, but I don't think so.  Will the publishing world be drastically different in three years?  There's a good possibility it will.

Lee also said:  "It's actually possible for an author nobody heard of to become a millionaire within just a matter of months. I'm not exaggerating. Everyone talks about Amanda Hocking...but perhaps the most astonishing success story of all is John Locke. (*snip*) Locke earned $126,000 on 369,000 sales on Amazon in March alone. That's a huge uptick from the 75,000 he sold in January and the 1300 he sold in November.  John Locke went from selling 1300 books to 369,000 in four months. Holy. Shit."

(You can find the whole blog post here.)

Lee has done very well with Kindle.  He has a huge backlist and, despite a busy career as a TV and movie producer, he's also a prolific author.

Meanwhile, I have put up 7 short stories and 4 novels and I'm not seeing anything like the kinds of sales Lee is seeing.  : (

Despite great reviews, and a very small but enthusiastic audience, my Jeff Resnick books have not taken off.  Instead of hundreds of thousands of sales a month (per title) I'm not even seeing hundreds of sales per book.

Sour grapes?

Yes.  Not so much for me, but for my series.  If I hadn't believed in my characters, I wouldn't have written four books and (so-far) two short stories about them.

I've received reviews from Library Journal and Booklist, and have rave reviews from readers on Amazon and Barnes&Noble.com.

I believed I could do better when it came to finding readers than my former (small) publisher, and so I followed in Lee's footprints and put them up on Kindle, Nook, and Smashwords (for distribution to other e sellers). So far, success has eluded those books.

(Man, those grapes are really SOUR!)

In the last few weeks I've:

• sent out over 2000 postcards to readers and librarians
• sent an e newsletter to over 4500 readers (although only 1675 opened it)
• offered the first book in the series for 99¢ in hopes that it would find new readers (so far it has, but not all that many), and encourage people to go looking for the other three books.

I'm at my wits end trying to figure out how this series can find a new audience.

Any ideas?

What's with the weather?

I live in a part of the US that has four distinct seasons.  Except they aren't.  Distinct, that is.  Winter eases into spring, eases into summer, eases into fall, eases back to winter.

Right now we're a month into spring and the weather doesn't know what the heck it wants to do. (Maybe that's why I like spring least of all.)  It can be rainy, snowy, windy, sunny all in one afternoon.  Or it can be incredibly hot.  Eight years ago we went to a wedding on March 30th and it was 82 degrees.  The next day it snowed.

The calendar says it's spring, but my furnace will probably be chugging along every night right into June.  (One year we were still running it into early July.)

Once summer finally arrives in July, it keeps going into October.  I like that.  Warm days, cool nights, right into mid-October.  Winter--forget it.  Ick, Ick, Ick for months on end. And then we're back to spring and the weather doesn't know what it wants to do again.

So, what's your favorite season?  And do you have a beef to share today?